Littlest

And I supposed, a day can never be exactly 'perfect' afterall.

Today, I'm rather intoxicated because I've finally ordered my customized birthday cake and that I've actually passed my grade 6 piano theory exam (pretty glad because I didn't put in much effort) but I should have seen it coming, that even if you see a rainbow, you'll too, encounter a storm too. Maybe right now, it's a peaceful storm.

Sometimes when I'm feeling low, I tend to keep my feelings because I don't know how to express them into words. I tend to pen them down because I've always wondered who actually really cares about your feeling like are those people just curious? It's like, what's the point of me saying 'Oh I'm not feeling good, I'm upset'. Do they really even care? Will some even think 'here she goes again, being overly emotional, having a scumbag mind thinking all the nonsenses, having a weak heart feeling all these shits, etc'? 

Time like this, I really wish someone could actually understand how exactly I'm feeling, this kinda unexpressed indescribable feeling, sadness? Maybe. I've no idea. Probably being too foolish and naive to somehow wish that someday, someone, a stranger or a friend or even a best pal, can actually totally understand.

Just because she smiles, doesn't mean she's happy, it simply means she's trying her best to be strong, to have faith and to hold on to the best she can hope for. But sometimes things just can't be the way she expects it to be, needless to say, even wishes it to be.

)':