The open letter

This is a letter to me, you, everyone and anyone else who's still reading this space of mine.

People who are dearly close to me these days would have clearly known what I've been really struggling through. A rather hysterical and impactful huge blow which I'd have never imagined myself to be going through but it happened, viciously. At that very moment, when I dawned upon the ugly truth, my heart didn't drop immediately, it went numb. I didn't know how to react, how to feel, how to accept and it really felt as though my heart died for a moment.

I was finding all means and ways to get a closure for myself. I did everything my way, the way which I thought would be the best for myself. I decided to get rid of everything that will remind me of this wreck. I really managed to do it and felt a lot better with the constant encouragement and emotional support from my friends and family... Not until I got a piece of news which made me feel like digging out the truth . Some may think it's pointless and asked me, will it change anything and does it really matter? Yes, I agreed it won't change anything but it did matter because you just want to know the truth. However, curiosity killed the cat, it hit me real hard because that was the very first time, I got insulted terribly by someone (whom has completely no idea of how this entire situation is).

Mad, upset, lost and all the mixed emotions came crumbling up. I knew I really have to put a stop to this complete mess and I had to get myself out of this misery. Trust me, that wasn't a cinch. Initially I thought avoiding it, getting distractions and reminding myself that I'm strong will be the best remedy but no. It was only when I finally burst out in tears and had a good cry after an accumulation of what I've been trying to feel that I felt that I'm near to the closure that I've been trying to find.

-

A relationship or what people name it as 'love', it's all about accepting, compromising, giving and taking to someone whom you truly want to be with. If things don't work the way you want it to be, it probably isn't meant to be at that point of your life. This is for the person who insulted me, you've to be clear of the situation and it's a fact that everything takes two hands to clap. You've no rights and you're in no position to judge when you're clearly just a third party. And sometimes, sorry has no meaning when you've incurred hurt to someone, intentionally or unintentionally.

And this is for you, the person who gave me this huge blow. I don't hate you and I won't despite what you've done. Like I've said, sorry means nothing sometimes but I'm choosing to forgive because that's what I can do best for myself. It's meaningless holding onto the bad because I'll only bring myself into misery. I'm glad I've put in my 100% and the best that I could because I wouldn't have any regrets if I happen to look back at it someday.

Now, I see all these as a blessing because I've realized I deserve better than this. I deserve someone who will accept me for who I am, love me the way I am and will never give up despite the obstacles. I've also realized who are those who will really be there for me, who are those whom I can fully trust and who are the true friends who won't judge me at all. I'm thankful too, for those who believe in me and gave me the best moral support and encouragement.

Everything definitely happened for a reason, and you'll only know the reason when everything is placed perfectly for you.